By Valerie Taylor
Talk dirty to me. Seriously. The dirtiest you have. If you are like most people, you are probably either confused about what “talking dirty” even is, or you are struggling to hold back phrases picked up from very sad pornography. Because, in the end, talking dirty is not about using the “f-word” repeatedly or screaming, “YES!” However, there is no denying the power of talking dirty during sex and the power it has when amplifying the pleasure.
Pull up a chair. It is time to get schooled in the art of talking dirty.
Tone
Let me first start by saying that dirty talk is not just about the words you use but how you say them. Tone, my dear, is going to get him harder faster than bacon-scented perfume (unless he is a vegetarian, of course). Avoid sounding squeaky, panicked, or like a prepubescent boy who is getting picked on. Channel your inner goddess, slowly saunter over to him, and whisper into his ear with a sultry, silky voice, “I want you so bad right now.”
The Language of Love
You know, pornography seems to get it all wrong. Swearing your butt off during sex can actually have an adverse effect. Instead, grab the last erotic book you received in your Kinkcrate and think of the dialogue as your textbook. Rehearse that stuff in front of the mirror, trying different purrs and seductive tones.
Avoid getting overly complicated with using the anatomical terminology. Unless he is a doctor, saying, “Babe, lick my areola,” just sounds silly.
Next, study these phrases:
1. I can’t stop thinking about the last we… you know.
2. I get so weak when I think about your hands on me/my vag/breasts/thighs.
3. I’ve been thinking about the mind blowing oral you’re getting tonight.
4. Use me however you want. I’m your toy.
5. Feeling you take control is the hottest thing ever.
6. When you look at me like that, I just want to rip your clothes off.
7. You taste so good.
8. Dominate me.
9. Finish wherever you want.
10. You’re going to take me over the edge.
11. You are my fantasy. I love your perfect hands all over my [insert body part here].
12. I love how you grab the sheets before cumming.
13. I love the way your breath pauses before I put my mouth on your [insert body part here].
14. Let me get on top of you so I can see your face full of pleasure.
15. You taste amazing. I could keep licking/sucking/nibbling forever.
16. Let’s try something new. I want to see you cum in every way possible.
17. Can we break out the Kinkcrate when you get home? I thought of a new way to make you as horny as I am right now.
So what are some of the major elements of these phrases? You will notice that they incorporate multiple senses and call upon memory.
In other words, if you want to level up your dirty vocabulary, you need to start thinking about the five senses: sight, smell, taste, touch, sound. These paint a much clearer picture in your partner’s mind than the standard, “That feels good” or “Take me now.” Yes, those do work… but getting descriptive enhances how your partner processes the information. Not only are you saying exactly what you want, you are being encouraging, open, and absolutely erotic.
Do not be afraid to throw in the names of toys received in your monthly subscription from Kinkcrate either. When you add the names of sex goodies into your text message, for example, you up the kinky anticipation. Dirty talk is all about descriptive language that gets to the nitty-gritty of your desires, so think about what you are saying. Fill it with desire. You cannot go wrong.
